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Life Transitions

You learn something new everyday

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I had never heard of collaborative law.

An old friend of mine Isabel Ilumin invited me to her husband’s event last week. It was a symposium on divorce and separation and what that means for all involved. At first Mike gave me looks and wondered why I was going to this event.

Isabel’s husband John is also a financial planner, and the event was held in conjunction with some guest speakers; a real estate broker, a collaborative lawyer, a family professional, and a mortgage specialist.

It was definitely a great night of learning! I don’t know about you but in my tender age of 49 I feel even more of a voracious appetite for learning! It makes me happy! Though the topic was definitely not a joyous one.

Firstly, did you know that over 40% of all marriages end in divorce? That’s a pretty staggering number if you ask me, but once I thought about it, I realized that some close family members and friends of mine are in fact divorced or separated, including my own biological parents. (Please remember to note the legal definitions of the two as when it comes to ownership and rights, there is a difference!)

About half of those divorces have dependent children involved. This is where collaborative law comes into play.

	Collaborative law is the process of a separating couple, agreeing to negotiate their affairs outside of litigation and the courts. Each of them has their own collaborative lawyer, and everyone works together instead of against each other.

They also have a team around them such as a family professional/social worker. The main goal for this type of arrangement is to preserve the relationships and to garner a healthy co-parenting relationship. Wow!

This is definitely not what we see in Hollywood is it? Husband and a wife with their own lawyers battling it out in court and what ends up happening? The kids get affected, too much money gets spent on lawyers, and in the end nobody’s happy….

This was such a beautiful event as it definitely taught me that it is more important to preserve relationships as the parents will always be the parents even as the kids get older and have their own relationships. People seem to forget that the Hollywood battling couple will end up having to see each other time and time again in the future when their kids graduate from school, get married, have kids and grandchildren.

Family is so important and has always been something that I’ve held dear to my heart and have always wanted to ensure I nourish and support.

Friends come and go, and apparently spouses also come and go… But your kids will always be your kids and always remember that!

You Planned the Vacation. Did You Plan the Retirement?

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We spent months planning our trip to the Philippines: restaurants, tours, flights, hotels, family visits. The research alone was a full-time job. And yet most of us spend less time planning our financial future than we do planning a two-week vacation.

That trip happened because our finances were in order. We knew what we had, what we’d saved, and what we could spend without losing sleep. That clarity is what I want for every person I work with.

Think about how much thought goes into choosing a restaurant. Price point. Cuisine. Ambience. You walk out satisfied because you planned it. Your RRSP contributions, your investments, and your timeline deserve at least the same attention, and the payoff is a lot bigger than a good bowl of pasta.

Does getting advice actually make a difference?

Research suggests it can. Russell Investments’ annual Value of an Advisor study estimates that working with an advisor can add value worth roughly 5% a year, and Vanguard’s long-running Advisor’s Alpha research puts it at around 3%. Much of that value doesn’t come from picking better investments. It comes from having a plan, using the right accounts, and staying the course when markets get bumpy. [Forbes covered the findings here]([FORBES URL]).

Results will always vary from person to person, but the bigger point stands: most people don’t have a plan because nobody ever sat down with them and built one. That’s not a character flaw. It’s a gap. And it’s exactly the kind of gap I help close.

The Roadmap: Where Should You Be Focusing Right Now?

Financial planning isn’t one-size-fits-all. What you should be doing at 28 is very different from what matters at 45. Here’s a plain-language guide to the questions worth asking at each stage.

Under 30: Build the Foundation

Saving for a house or wedding? This is the moment to get intentional about where that money lives and how it grows. The FHSA (First Home Savings Account) is one of the best tools the government has ever offered first-time buyers, and a lot of people under 30 still haven’t opened one.

Are you minimizing your income tax? Even a small RRSP contribution at this stage can lower your tax bill today and gives that money decades to grow. The habit matters more than the amount.

Is your TFSA working? Not just open, but actually invested, rather than sitting in a savings account earning next to nothing.

30 to 40: Grow What You’ve Built

What are you actually invested in? “My bank handles it” is not a plan. Do you know what your money is doing over the next 10 years?

Dreaming of a cottage or a bigger home? Those goals need a savings strategy, not just a wish. Let’s map it out.

Got kids? The RESP is one of the most underused tools in Canada. The government adds 20% on the first $2,500 you contribute each year, up to $500 per child annually. That’s free money sitting on the table.

40 to 50: Protect the Nest Egg

What does your retirement actually look like? Not in theory, in real dollars. What monthly income do you need, and are you on track to have it? This is the decade to get specific.

You still have a 20 to 30 year runway. That’s not the home stretch. That’s still plenty of time to compound. Don’t let fear push you into being too conservative too soon.

Mortgage paid off? Now what? That freed-up cash flow is one of the most powerful financial tools you’ll ever have. Most people just absorb it back into spending. There’s a much better use for it.

Not sure where you stand for your age and stage?

Let’s find out together. One conversation, no obligation. Bring your questions, your uncertainty, or just a general sense that you should probably be doing more. That’s exactly where we start.